There are people that they find the love of their life in line at a supermarket or those who bump into someone on the street and discover by looking into each other’s eyes that they are destined to be together. Mutual friends, blind dates, nights out or even at work… any environment can be the right one to find your other half.
For others things are more complicated and although actively search love, for example through applications to find a partner, it seems that there is always something that goes wrong, which makes those dates that they go to with all the enthusiasm they don’t turn out as well as they should.
Practice makes perfect, but going on dates that don’t go well or starting to see a person and soon seeing how nothing ends up working out can be very frustrating. There is not just one reason why this happens, each person is different and there are many variables to take into account, but there may be some common reasons why these appointments do not end up working.
Errors why my appointments don’t work
There are common mistakes we make that should not be part of a first date (or any). For example, the date will probably not end well if someone is late or if is constantly looking at the phoneif you only talk about yourself or if instead of having a conversation in which you show interest in the other, you wait for ‘their turn’ to end to tell what we want.
Beyond these errors that we can detect and avoid if we are careful, there are times when, despite arriving on time, smell good, eat with your mouth closed, showing interest or treating waiters politely, dating doesn’t work. This may be because the problem is a little deeper and a little introspection is necessary. Are you doing something wrong?
One of the most common errors is create too many expectations with the first date. This is not the same as getting excited, which is a good thing, it is creating such great pressure on that first meeting that it is impossible for what we expect from it to be fulfilled. If we become obsessed with the fact that this person has to be the definitive one and we consider thousands of future scenarios, it is more likely that we will let’s end up disappointed.
It may be that the problem lies in the selection we make when looking for a partner. We tend to look for someone who is perfect, that meets all those demands that we expect from a long-term partner, but that is a mistake that can cost us dearly because the key is not to look for someone who is perfect, but who is perfect for us. Life is not free of problems and the key is to find someone who complements us and helps us overcome them.
Furthermore, this demand to find someone who is perfect will end up, once again, generating great frustration because it can lead us to think that we will never find anyone and that, when you are actively looking for love, can be very hard.
He fear is another factor that makes us fail. Sometimes it is because of past experiences, when we have suffered before, we tend to approach a new relationship with lead feet, which does not allow us to enjoy, let ourselves go and be ourselves completely.
He fear to fail It makes us feel smaller, with less self-esteem and that is reflected in the way others see us. Self-esteem is also crucial, because it helps us feel safe and comfortable with ourselves and that makes us feel safe and comfortable with our environment as well. Feeling comfortable in your skin can be essential to connecting with another person.
It also usually appears fear of rejection, to reveal a part of ourselves that makes us feel vulnerable and insecure and that is why we tend to hide it. This can mean that the other person doesn’t really get to know us, we don’t show ourselves as natural and as we are and that can mean that dates don’t go well.
It is not worth forgetting that how much The more we interact with others, the better we will feel doing it., it will be easier. Something similar happens with dating and we may have to go through several first dates until we find that person with whom we can feel comfortable from the beginning or who helps us achieve it over time.
Themes
2024-05-26 06:00:24
#arent #appointments #working #wrong
