Opinion TV review
What were Elton and Jonas Hector thinking…
Status: 18:07 | Reading time: 4 minutes
From disinterested to miserably prepared: Elton hosts the “EM Studio” on RTL
Source: dpa/Thomas Banneyer
TV channels are trying to save the strong football ratings for the accompanying programs during the European Championship. We have watched two programs for you so that you don’t have to: “Studio Pille-Palle” and the “EM Studio”.
There are TV absurdities during the course of a European Football Championship that are hard to ignore, especially during the days when there are no matches…
Bavaria’s anti-drug lord Markus Söder is definitely one of them! Sipping liquor (Küstennebel/21.8 percent), he revealed intimate details of spotty youth in Ina Müller’s cult show from the Hamburg harbor bar “Schellfischposten”. Sub-text: ‘Drinking is allowed at all times, but smoking weed is not allowed!’
Oh well! You think it can’t get much more unpleasant? Then you clearly haven’t drifted off to the Euro 2012 program. We’ve watched two shows for you…
“Pillar-Palle Studio” (MagentaTV)
If you want to watch the 32-minute late-night format with actor Fahri Yardim and former national player Jonas Hector, have your Telekom youth protection pin ready – you will need it!
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Blood, fouls and foul language! While Jan Henkel (50/the Jörg Schönenborn of football dissectors) regularly shines in the Magenta EM program with the best, because most transparent, game analyses in televised football, Yardim and Hector offer almost exclusively ANALYTICAL content. For those who have become addicted to the feeling of embarrassment in Yardim’s cult series “Jerks.”, they will learn in “Studio Pille-Palle” that the feeling of embarrassment can also have a lasting impact.
Moderator Fahri Yardim
Source: picture alliance/dpa/Gregor Fischer
Episode 1: Restless Yardim (“From the heart chakra to the diaper area – we are the afterbirth. The little digestive schnapps.”) copulates with a boxing dummy while rolling around on the floor. Hector (“Emotionally, I’m not used up”) seems somewhat embarrassed.
Episode 2: Yardim seems a little more controlled, but then insults the studio audience: “Today we invited people for inner beauty.” He then allegedly nibbles on excrement that someone has put in his lawn. What is this crap about?
Episode 3: Yardim (“The anal sphincter says Hallelujah-dingdong! Poop on the foot.”) reveals once again that he seems to have somehow gotten stuck in his anal phase (18 months to 3 years of age) – according to Siegmund Freund. When it comes to Spain’s prodigy Lamine Yamal (16), he says: “No hair on his balls, but he can act like Zidane in the brothel.” He observes Austria coach Ralf Rangnick “nibbling his earlobes” and says he has a “hard nipple” when celebrating with goal scorer Christoph Baumgartner. Yardim (“We are sex-positive”) is as unpleasant as the mosquito plague in the DFB camp.
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Episode 4: Deeper, deeper and deeper below the belt! True to the motto “In the land of the little pill men” (Yardim, who else?!?), the focus is on the Italian Riccardo Calafiori lying on the ground with a bulge in his pants. Yardim ponders: “Fully or semi-stiff?” The level: complete catastrophe.
Before the start of the season, Telekom TV boss Arnim Butzen announced that he wanted to create “innovative TV entertainment”: “We have the courage to try something new. Fahri and Jonas (…) will delight football fans with their unconventional humor.”
Improvisation TV may work well for a series like “Jerks.” But as an extension of the European Championships, it’s a complete failure. How did Hector end up in this pointless anarcho format? Did he really think he was the new Christian Ulmen (Yardim’s congenial “Jerks.” partner)?
“EM-Studio” (RTL)
What was Elton thinking when he took over the hosting of the daily RTL show “EM Studio”? Probably: ‘It’s produced by “Raab TV”, there’s money – I have to do it.’
The result: watching the nightly raccoon invasion on Kassel’s streets is more interesting than this superficial show. In almost every episode, Elton (real name: Alexander Duszat), wearing a slogan T-shirt, seems disinterested or poorly prepared. The attempt to combine information and entertainment television did not work on RTL. The result: a ratings flop. The joke clips from “TV Total” voice Manfred Winkens and a playback appearance by Peter Schilling (68/”Völlig losgelöst”) are of little help. Much of it seems forced and only created for the advertising environment.
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Elton has just announced that the jersey swap between Ronaldo and Georgia hero Khvitsha Kwarazchlia didn’t work out, and the director is already playing a video of Kwarazchlia wearing a CR7 jersey in the dressing room. Embarrassment and embarrassment – that’s what happens every day on Elton’s Euro TV.
Luckily, there are editions presented by colleague Jana Wosnitza (who stepped in for the ill Jan Köppen). A blessing. Just like the admirable calm of the experts Thomas Helmer and Felix Kroos, who often have to visibly suppress their boredom. Even European champion Mario Basler suddenly seems enlightened and refreshed in Elton’s environment: “I can’t remember ever having such a plague of mosquitoes – but then again, we were usually never in the hotel…”
Absurdities from the European Championship niche – fortunately the round of 16 matches continue this weekend.
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The article was researched for the Sports Competence Center (WELT, SPORT BILD, BILD) and first published in BILD.
